H is Having Affair after all - Part 2

[saffie]

Evie,

I just read your post and this bit jumped out at me:

Good question, D1 (19)has asked a lot more than d2(17). D2 has just spent the week with her dad and her dad has told her that i left him b/c i had an affair with current H. D2 came to me and said 'so mum, you had affair with ***** (current H)'. We couldn't talk at that time, so i have said we will talk about things. I don't know what XH's motive was for telling d2, but i'm not pleased. Now i'm in the position that i'm going to have to tell her things i wasn't ready to tell her at this time nor do i think she is ready to hear it or deal with it right now.

My dad did this when my mum left him. He even went further I think and I remember him telling my sister and I he would tell us something about our mother that would make us hate her......we were 8 and 11 at the time.

My mum sat us down and told us about things in her past that he was threatening to tell us and hanging over her head - stuff she would rather have never told us or waited until we were older. She was very matter of fact and I can honestly say I only loved her more for learning these things about her; and it made my dad look real mean that he had tried to influence us and make us judge her - she was our mum!!!!! We knew she only ever acted in our best interests. Don't worry about telling your girls things - the sooner the better now it's been brought up. My sister and I were younger than your D's but we still knew/ sensed what was right and what was not.

(((((Big Hugs))))))

Sorry I have not been around much.