I guess it's time to get to work

[Michael Mc C]

Been a week of ups and downs here. The downs have been due to my over-analysis of things my wife says and fluctuations in our interactions.

We've had a couple of awkward conversations and things really seemed to be going downhill quick.

Last night was no exception I'm afraid.

Anyway, I wrote my wife an email explaining what I believe to be at the root of my behavioral changes - trust. She hasn't given me any reason NOT to trust her since sometime around the beginning of the year and yet whenever I sense a shift in her dealings with me I start to wonder what's on her mind, what she's planning - in short, I'm looking for a sign of deception.

Coming to that conclusion this morning has been a weight off my shoulders. My trust in her will not come overnight. She also has trust issues with me. Not that she's afraid I'm going anywhere but she wonders when the other shoe is going to drop and I prove that my changes are not real.

Time, patience, growing and healing.

We're going out tonight to see Milo Z with some friends and family. She has never seen them and we're both really looking forward to a night out.