NikB #25

[NikB]

OT - thanks for the perspective.

Hmmm.

You make a very good point about it tainting my interactions with him. I'm trying my best not to let it but I know that it is. That and I'm just avoiding being around him. That's not good.

On the money stuff - agreed - the responsibilities don't change and the taxes are already filed, so that doesn't matter. The hold up is that both taxes and mortgage are already scheduled to come out of my account, and H can't give me his portion until he gets paid again.

If he moves out suddenly and I know how to reach him no problem. What I'm worried about is what he's talked about before - just taking off, period, nobody knows where he went. When I got the first bomb he told me he had almost done exactly that (he went on planned road trip and told me he almost didn't come back.) Granted it's fantasy land and would be a very dumb thing to do... doesn't mean he wouldn't do it.

Mulling this over and talking it out more here though. (kinda thinking out loud). The likelihood of him following through with that fantasy is probably pretty slim. If he does it I'd be screwed financially but I could figure something out.. cash advance from a credit card or 401k loan... something like that. Not necessarily great options but they are short term alternatives.

Long story short after all that thinking - OT, you're right. I need to address it. I've already put an extra week of distance/"ick" between us by not talking about it.

I am dreading the conversation. (feels like I'm pretty much bringing the next bomb on myself), but you're right.

I am going out with friends tonight and likely won't even see H until late and after some drinks (have a designated driver) - not a good state of mind to bring it up. I will make myself do it this weekend though.