Sounds like you've got a bad case of the himhimhim's. I'm writing you a prescripton for mememe's.
I viewed my spouse as a demigod. He was so wonderful at so many things and that although I had some good qualities, nothing compared to the man he was. Eventually my sense of self worth resulted in me clinging to him for his approval. My sense of reality became very warped.. and I lost 'me', the woman he was attracted to, in the process.
Oopsie.
1. You know in your heart that you're beautiful, but it's easier to be modest.
2. You and he were both very lucky and blessed to find each other. Getting married isn't a one way road.
3. You can't expect others to give you the answers you want to hear. What you can do is define your boundaries and expectations, then ask the question. Just be prepared hear something you don't want to.
4. Decide if you want to go the DR path or the more traditional anger/hurt/some thoughts of revenge/rejection stew. One thing I've found is the positive mental attitude, the 'can do' philosphy helps me immensely.
4a. Consider talking to one of the counselors here.. or a solution based therapist. They were good at clunkin' my noggin so I understood what was going on.
5. You cannot control the actions of others, only your response.
6. Writing letters and soulful conversations aren't working with your H or BFF. Try something different..
7. TRY YOU!
Now.. just for the record, you're wonderful, you're beautiful, you're caring. Just give yourself some o' that love you slather on others.
