Well last night H was over. Everyone seemed in good spirits. I spoke to him about the daycare phone call I'd received and my concerns. He said that it's likely the terrible two's but that he and I will continue to show her how we hope her to behave..
Overall, it was a nice visit. H put D2 to bed.. then he came to hang out with me in the master bedroom. I was looking up school programs on my laptop so he grabbed his laptop and started downloading music. Every once in a while I would say a song that I like.. and he'd say he has that one and play it for me. It was nice. It felt intimate just hanging out, being comfortable but not talking.
His throat was bothering him so I sent him home with heavy duty mouthwash (from when I had strepthroat.. it kills bacteria big time), some ColdFx tablets and Buckleys. I wished him luck today because he's got some important meetings and he wished me luck since my work is taking me out for my goodbye lunch.. and he knows it will be tough for me.
I noticed I had a text this morning as I was leaving to take D2 to daycare. It was from H.. He wrote "I wanted to let you know that I love you. I know I don't say it so often anymore but I always have and always will no matter what." My initial thought was that I had just finished saying I couldn't remember the last time he told me that.. then I thought, it sounds nice.. but the "no matter what" part makes me feel uncomfortable.. and kind of ruins the warm fuzzy feeling from the first part.
Anyway, just what's been going on and how I'm feeling.
I hadn't realized that you posted to me because I was writing my lengthy post at the same time.
I do hope that D2 is just going through a phase... and I am going to make an even bigger priority of helping her feel secure.
As for the antisocial thing. I feel like I can be me without worrying about the physical aspect of me on these boards. As I mentioned before I think I have a lot of great qualities and am attractive but I don't think I'm the typical beauty.. so I have insecurities about how I look (especially with these braces on) and how intelligent I am. I find when you meet people face to face they generally judge you within the first couple of minutes.. and although overall I like who I am and feel like I'm a good person.. I tend to care too much about what other people think of me.. and that's why I consider myself antisocial. I don't really put myself out there for fear of judgement.
Ok, this is getting frustrating... What does KWIM mean?
Typical beauties are "passe", history, not exciting anymore... It's charm and wit and the way people feel around you that makes a difference. It's the way you look at somebody and the way you attract somebody's look on you... Since, you are not missing any of the above, no need to talk about this anymore...
You have nothing to worry about. Your personality alone makes you a super hot woman. Tall doesn't hurt either.
I need to be careful, I don't want to upset Kalni, but you are awesome. And, you have no issues with smarts. I have no idea why you would feel that way.
Relax, the braces are temporary. Your beauty is forever.
