GB, I did think long and hard (ummm...) before going this route. My marriage vows included "to have and to hold" and that vow has also been broken. But I want to grow old with my wife, in sickness and in health, for rich or poor; be grandparents together, complain about our aches and pains, all of that. Actually, I love her so much I don't want to keep pestering her with my libido. It makes her unhappy.
What about the headlines? I wouldn't want any of the last 19 years in the news, either. "Grown Man Cries Over Lack of Sex". The heck with that. Nobody wants their kids to be privy to their sex life, even if it is harmonious and faithful. If my "hobby" is discovered, I can explain to my eldest son (grown and away from home) that Dad tried for almost two decades to make it work. But there is a thing called a private life; there is nothing but emotional hurt for those who do not understand the history.
Truthfully? I would love to introduce my wife to the other woman's husband. She loves dogs and gardening. He loves dogs and gardening. They could discuss ground cover while walking around the park; we could be shagging like no tomorrow. Why doesn't this work? Because our culture says it is wrong. But maybe it is our culture that is wrong...
Maybe I'm trying to hard to justify my actions, I have been conditioned to believe I am wrong, and I lived that way for a long, long time. Is there a better solution? What is it?
