Affair is over and WW is responding

[Hope4us]

I really don't have a problem paying for everything (I can afford it), but I don't want her using me to fund her nest egg so she can exit when the last of our kids moves on. I'm really ok with her having disposable income, but I kind of want her to get an understanding that stuff costs money and if she wants to leave the marriage, fine, but her standard of living will not be anywhere close to what she has now. I guess I understand her wanting her own disposable income, but I've never denied her anything she's wanted (except the $30,000 inground pool for the house we'll probably only be in for a few more years). I can see though how it may have made her feel not in control of her money when she had to ask me if it was ok to spend money on clothes etc. (and she's good at that!, but again I like her having new clothes etc so it's not a problem with me)

I know it almost seems like keeping her hostage, but correct me if I'm wrong, part of being an attractive mate is being able to provide for your spouse, so if she see's the reality of the situation maybe she'll find me more attractive since I can provide her a pretty decent standard of living.