Hi W2G, I am new to these boards and was reading your post here. Sounds like you are doing great and progress is being made. Keep it up. I hope everything goes well with your Mom.
I do have a question for you as you appear to be in a state like I am where my W and I have two kids and we can have regular conversations, do you find that your key is by not talking about the relationship at all? I have a bad habit of doing this and I can tell it only pulls W further away. We have been S for 4 months.
Keep up the great work you are doing, I'm hoping to learn something by those who appear to be strong through this and seem to be making an impact on there R.
That sounds gREAT!! You do realize that it is a pretty good deal that hanging out and spending time with H and having a good time is just "ordinary"? That is quite a major accomplishment!
Girl, I am giving you a HUGE WOO HOO!!! Way to figure it out yourself with the heat!!
W2G, Great job with H and the furnace!!!! maybe you should have called him anyway just to give him the impression that he was useful. Us guys like to think we are useful sometimes :-)
I tell you W2G, you heating and air conditioning repair, and jenny and her cookies wine bar and laundromat, we girls are on to something!!
Great job on the furnace!
bear
Me 42-Him 40 T20yrs Married 16yrs 2/06 H- "not sure if i want to be married anymore" 6/07 H-"I'm not happy" 9/07 Admits affair & OW 12/08 I moved out 12/09 still waiting for divorce
I realized something today.. I've always felt like I'm kind of lazy.. a home body.. unmotivated... very introverted or anti-social.. in analyzing myself today I think I may not actually be all of those things or at least not to the degree that I had thought. I think I just may fear failure or inadequacy so instead I don't really put myself out there. The more I think about it the more I think I'm right about this. Now I need to figure out what I can do to change it.
Other than that I received a call from the daycare today telling me that D2 is acting out and not listening. I guess she runs away and makes a game out of not listening and throws herself on the floor when she gets upset. I'm not sure if this is just a stage of the terrible 2's or if it's a combination of the terrible 2's plus her feeling insecure right now due to the separation. It's kind of got me a bit down. I'm just going to give her a big hug when I get home and tell her how much I love her.. then I'll need to figure out a way to help her understand how important it is to listen to her teachers and her mommy and daddy.
The fear of failure and inadequacy themes are things I think I can relate to. It is a part of what I need to get to work on as well. I have always chalked it up to laziness as well in me.
I hope your day is going well and that things get straightened out with D2. Talk to ya later. May God bless you.
Don't mean to jump on you journaling, but holy cow, are you sure your not in my head? do you have my house bugged when i talk to myself?
This has been exactly how I have been feeling as of late. I don't see these things as being bad, such as the homebody, thing. Its not being lazy, I enjoy my down time but not to an extreme. I am introverted I would not say either of us are anti-social, (can tell that from you posts, and my gut feeling about you.) We are set in our comfort zone i think.
I also to a point don't put myself out there, since i have no girlfriends, just some friends from work that is it. I have been hurt by friends those who i thought were my best friends have only hurt me.
I think this is the way i have always been, and it just gets to me when I am told I need to get out, i need to get a life, (i don't mean to sound angry about this, that is not the point) I am happy, i did/do enjoy being home with H. He never said that he wanted to go out and do things, I thought he was happy like me. But so it seems not so much. I just wish besides the sex and 3 kids, what else does she have. My mom told me she must be a total opposite of you. She may be right.
I know change is good, but how do we change, if maybe deep down inside we are happy?
Sorry W2G, did not mean to jump in you journaling. I just read your post and had to reply while it was on my mind. Jenny says she is reading a book that is changing her life, i asked her for the title, maybe it would be a book we both could be interested in.
hugs bear
Last edited by phbear316; 03/26/0808:16 PM.
Me 42-Him 40 T20yrs Married 16yrs 2/06 H- "not sure if i want to be married anymore" 6/07 H-"I'm not happy" 9/07 Admits affair & OW 12/08 I moved out 12/09 still waiting for divorce
are you getting ready to put yourself out there? Good!!!!!!!
I cannot post much these days (comp related problem), just wanted to say hello and give you a ((hug)).
I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders ____________________________________________________ M 46 H 45 D 17 M/T 23 Bomb #1 (ILYBNILWY) 12.06 Bomb #2 (OW) 12.07 Bomb #3 (chose OW over M) 9.08
Don't worry about your little one. She is definitely confused but I don't think that's why she is pulling tricks on her teacher. My kids were like that when they were 2-3 and we were fine back then They go through stages and phases. Just be consistent and make her feel secure.
As far as you is concerned, maybe taking baby steps "out there" would be a good idea. Once you figure out you enjoy things you didn't think you would, it will be so much easier to "expand". BTW, you would be the last person I would call antisocial on this board... You come across as exactly the opposite...
