That is a sweet story... my cello teacher actually waited through her now-husband's two other (crappy) marriages before marrying him in her 50's. So I have some good models for very patient people... not that I am planning to wait *that* long necessarily.
I feel like I am living my life, I don't feel like this is something that's holding me back. I feel like whatever work I'm being motivated to do for reconciliation, is also work I really need to do for myself as a person. All i'm saying is that I don't feel like my life is on hold because of the R. And I do not feel stuck. I really feel like I am growing a lot.
I have his email address, I can contact his inlaws, I can contact his friends. All of these things are possible, but I *really* do not want to get up in his face. I want to make contact in the gentlest, least invasive way possible, in a way where he can deal with it in his own time, on his own terms. I think anything else would invite a big knee-jerk "I don't ever want to talk to you again" reaction, or just something extremely emotionally charged, which would negate the possibility of it being positive, lighthearted, upbeat, or fun. I also really strongly feel that if I contacted other people in his life, like his mom or friends, to confirm his address, or whatever, it would get back to him and he would be extremely pissed that I "went behind his back" and involved other people from his life instead of just going straight to him. That is just my feeling...
