You have been more caring and concerned for HER than you have yourself, even through her BS. Normally, to be self-sacrificing is a good thing - in a HEALTHY relationship where both parties are each other's priority and it balances out - in this case, it has been to your detriment. And severely so. You ought to be getting angry and anger can be productive and it can also be the first sign towards healing. In your case, while there is certainly a long, long way to go - the anger suggests to me that you are pulling out of the nosedive. That's not to say this isn't still going to hurt and be hard as hell, it just says I have been very worried for you and while I'm still reserved, I see the light at the end of your tunnel even if you don't.
