Thanks Sandi, we are starting the seperation paper work. In NC you have to wait one year and one day before divorce is final so I still have 8 months to maybe show some changes.
Here is a question that I have for others, in DR it states that I need to start the dark side, my W and I still have a talking relationship. Our boys are both into sports and we go to those functions, in fact at many of them we walk around together to get exercise. The other problem is my W works with the same company that I do so we do have some contact through work also. I guess my question is this, what do I do about our time together? I can not stop going to my kids events. We still have to communicate some due to work. I guess I am somewhat thankful that our marriage hasn't ended to the extent that we don't talk at all or see eachother.
I do have a problem of bring up our R with her. I know this is wrong and I have to stop as I know it is probably only pushing her further away.
I asked my W last night if she would consider watching Michelle's DVD set she has for sale in her store about why divorce is not the answer. Is this a good idea to purchase these and have my wife watch them? She said she would maybe watch them, at least it's a start. Any opinions on this?
I can tell you that when I got my own place 2 weeks ago and was happy about finally getting out of my parents house, I saw a softer woman in her that I felt walls may be starting to come down. I was talking to her about what I plan on doing to the yard and other things. She actually helped me put beds together and move things in. We went to dinner that night and a few nights afterwards. I thought I was making progress but stupid me I had to bring our R up and I got shot back down. Now she is back to where she was for the most part.
My W is a giving person by nature, she has stated on many occasions that we can keep this professional while going through with D. So part of me feels that she is only doing all of this because she can be professional and being the type of person she is and other parts of me just hope that maybe she is coming around. Who knows? It's like everytime I bring up trying to save our marriage she has another reason for why we shouldn't. Yesterdays reason was we didn't see eye to eye with the kids, she is the one that disciplines and I am the easy one with them which bothers her. Of course I told her we could work that out but the more we talked the more she would shut down and ask how much longer I planned on staying there.
So what do I do now? We have to communicate due to the kids. Any advice for what I should do from here on out?
