BT - If she is not talking to you, or is acting irrationally, I would really hesitate on asking her to go to Retrouvaille. Major, major pressure.
If you can get to the point where you are having rational discussions, and you feel that your R has a chance of succeeding, Retrouvaille might be that extra step needed to get you both on the same page. But now? I don't think so.....but of course I reserve the right to be wrong.
I wouldn't even think of asking my W about Retrouvaille. and I think our sitch is better than many.
