Need Help

[troubled_husband]

Just an update. This weekend was pretty bad. There was a couple of different things. I think I will probably post them separately. Part of this is a 'public journaling' to vent, but I really do need advice.

On Saturday afternoon we had what she insisted should have been a little thing that I blew out of proportion. Maybe I did, I don't know.

Basically, we needed to clean and trim the guinea pig. It has been a while so the poor animal was quite matted. When doing the trimming, I said I was concerned about trimming it too short because we keep our house pretty cool (about 64) in the winter. She answered that it was set at 64 but really 70. It was a little argument with a lot of history. I decided to check the living room remperature, which bugged her. It was between 64 and 65. I returned and told her that and she responded, I don't believe you, can we just get on with the trimming. I got bent out of shape. I hear the 'I don't believe you' statement a lot. I finally told her to check it herself, which she fought against, telling me I was being silly and childish. Then I did insist. She went over and said it said 68. (it is one of those standard dial thermostats with the dial thermometer, not difficult to read). I argued a little longer but let it go. After we were done, I rechecked (I was wondering if I was that crazy or messed up). And I was right. Even asked my son to check, he said he didn't need to. He knows I was right, that's the way the temperature always is in the downstairs.

So here's my problem. My wife always accuses me of thinking and implying she is stupid. I actually think she is fairly intellegent. But I can't convince her of that. I know my wife can read a thermometer, it doesn't take a rocket scientist (even my learning disabled son can do that). So what is going on here. I made the stand because I have decided to stop letting her insinuate or call me a liar. I got pinged pretty hard on this incident in a R discussion she started last night (she asked what was bothering me and I brought up this issue because it is one of the bigger ones to me). I couldn't get her to generalize the issue other than say, you do it too. To try to get some resolution even on the small part, I asked her to check it again, and she gave the same answer. What gives?


Forgiveness:
is not something earned but given.
is based on the forgiver not the forgiven.
means never holding it against a person again.