Karen my h did the same in any ways. He said he wanted the D and then started his physical affair. He was involved for atleast 2w months before we separated and we are still not D and he is living with her. But he also tries to suck me into fights. The other day he was fine when he visited d but as he was leaving he started a fight. For the first time instead of fighting back I backed off and said I was not going to fight him. I even said that by fighting with him he will go home feeling justified in what he is doing. He did back off and actually apologized. That was a first and it was definitley a better approach.
