Letter from WAW after she flew to my city for talk

[GH31]

Hi TAL,

Thanks for getting in touch and giving me your input. She is very confused at the moment it seems, but recently the message has been consistent every time we have spoken - at least for the last month. Her fixity of thought is encouraging in that she *appears* less confused than before (although I am not going to jump the gun).

I think this separation was a bomb waiting to go off, because my selfishness and verbal abuse once coupled with something else (miscarriage) would eventually have created the perfect marital storm. She was right to leave given the terrible jerk that I was. As I have said before, it's what happened subsequent to the separation that has been hard to swallow. The uncertainly and torment of being completely alone in a new city and separated from the one I love was also too much to bear at times.

She said last Thursday that "she wants to come back", "doesn't believe in divorce", "we make a fabulous team" and that she "can't give up on her marriage" so this is encouraging although I cannot allow myself to completely trust her word yet (although I want to). If and when she comes back - or not, is when I will feel more certain. The fact that she is on holiday with some former work colleagues including OM make me very very wary about trusting her word. As per DBing I am still not believing anything that I hear.

I absloutely applaud the DBers that hang in there sometimes for a year or more so that they can save their marriages. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done but I cannot imagine NOT doing whatever it takes to save my marriage. I'm so glad I found this site and you guys.

All the best,

GH31