I was hoping some of the "old" familiars would come around. Thank you for your words of encouragement.
Yes, I honestly needed the time away... I took a vacation from my life if you will. I devoted myself to learning to live with myself, I had to learn to not just "get by" to not just think of what I am doing now as my "inbetween" or "until we are back together". I had to relearn my life. I realized that he is my "inbetween" he is my "until...((whatever))" this is my life, and he is NOT part of it.
I am not only surviving I am thriving!
I went about three months without talking to him from August 2007 - October 2007. I got all my divorce papers, put things into action, got my job, got myself stablized. and then we had court.... and I started thinking about Kevin. I put myself into a tail-spin, but I stuck to my guns enough to tell him I had everything needed to file I only needed him to show up and OK for the notary, etc. I had all the custody everything, I just needed his signature. He told me he and OW had been broken up and he was thinking of me, etc etc etc etc blah blah blah blah. I fell back in, I let all my hard work slip away. I believe everything he said, until one day he called and told me she was pregnant again, he had been lying for 6 months, he was living with her etc etc etc blah blah blah.
So here I sit, in the same old hole... at least I know where the ladder is now, it's only hard to get up the engery to climb it again...
I have missed you all... I am back..... I want to work on this... but I want to do it the right way!
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I guess I would say you need to detach, yet again! YES!!! I m guessing you were there when you thought you were getting divorced, but then he managed to pull you back in. So, I think you need to get back on the D path again. But this time, don't listen to he pleading and begging. And if he gets mean? Well, is that who you want back? No way!!! At this point I would tel him that if he really wants a relationship with you it is going to START after you are divorced, and he can prove to you that he deserves another chance. Good idea... love it! Stick around, you'll get support here! I'm going to make sure Amy knows you are here. She been through crap (as you know) but she is still Amy! I've been thinking about Amy a lot! Can't wait to hear from her!!
