I remember when I was days away from my D. I just allowed myself to be sad (and angry). I didn't fight it and pampered myself.
And a wise poster posted to me and said that the actual D was anticlimatic compared to all the post bomb drama. And he was right. I did not go to court myself - only the petitioner has to be present in Illinois.
Make sure you plan to be with a good friend right after the D.
You have children with STBX so you may not be able to do this... I allowed myself to descend to totally fulfiling and satisfying juvenile behavior. I spent the two days after the D shredding every single picture of The X! There were posters that nicknamed me The Shredder!
If this type of thing works for you, see if you can find an equally satisfying ritual.
You will be fine. The D will give you closure and you will move on. You are young and you have a lifetime ahead of you - it will be different than you expected but you will feel joy w/o any sadness again someday. I promise - I never make idle promises.
