Bruce, Great comments! Women are smarter in everyway. i like your comment about not putting our happyness in the hands of others. It is our choose. I am losing myself in her. I think she thinks I was out with another women last night, I had several phone calls this morn and she said why don't you answer "her" call? I assured her there was no her.
This is (your below comments from Purr's page) exactly where I am. I could not have said them better. My W is so negative about me right now i can not stand it. Any question I ask her nicely turns into this huge black holed arguement. It is terrible. I feel she hates me so much and I feel I have done nothing to deserve this. She must feel that i am holding her back from doing something that she really wants to do. i don't know anymore, I am very confused and trying to make sence of it all. i need to start thing just about me but that is very hard with three kids in the house and a W that I am very concerned about.
"Do you really want to be with that type of person? I know that's a blunt question, one I still have a hard time dealing with. I know the type of person I want and need to be with, and in many ways my W was/is not that person. Still, the pull of history pulls us back, or makes it hard to walk away, doesn't it? It's as if part of me knows it's time to move on and take what I've learned in search of a better relationship, yet part of me still holds out some hope (naive?) that the old relationship can be transformed. I see transformation in myself, and read a million stories about transformed marriages, and want to believe it's possible with us. But I also know that many situations don't end that happily. Our wives are on their own journeys, and we must continue on ours."
