I'm curious what was the turning point was for you?
When he told me he was moving in with her and in the same breath that he wants 60/40 custody of both kids come May 1st.
I realized a few things... He's going down this road with her and quickly. They say the faster they live together the sooner it may self destruct. Here's hoping. But moreso that if he is living with someone else and dragging my kids into this whole craziness with him, the best thing I can do is be their rock. I am not doing them any favours if I don't accept the current circumstances. Plus, then I'm not making the most of the time I DO have with them because I'm dwelling too much. It could eat me alive if I let it...and I won't. That's why I love the dropping the rope statement that I posted on Brit's thread...because it still says "you love your S and would love to see the marriage restored", but for me that is just not a possibility at the moment.
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I take it your H is consistently negative towards you?
H has become very angry and negative toward me since I told him that I would not give him 60/40 custody of a 6 month old baby come May 1st. I asked him to look at compromises and he said no, that is is compromise from 50/50. Also, he keeps mentioning that he has no money (duh) and that he's 'doing so much' by still allowing me to live here and him support me. He actually told me today that I should go back to work early. I'm so tired of him having a selective picture of the sitch. When it works in his favour he says it's in the kids best interest, when it doesn't....then it's irrelevent. Anyway, I could go and on about this one. We had a big fight this morning when he picked up S. He told me talked to his L and "the S#!T is going to hit the fan". WTF? My lawyer actually said that what he wants is "ridiculously unreasonable".
Anyway, Brit I don't know if I answered your question. But I obviously have some major decisions to make with regards to my children and to my home. I can't make these decisions if I'm clouded by the "what might be's" of H's decisions. I can not even imagine where we're all going to be a year from now, but I know one thing...if I'm not back with H, I'll be living a wonderfully happy and fulfilled life. But if I don't get to work on that now...then it's just procrastination.
Oh...and as soon as I started to consider myself single again...I'm getting all excited about the prospect of dating. It won't be any time soon, but it's fun to think about. I actually think it's kind of funny.... My H leaves me for a woman who is 10 years older than him and who has 3 kids. He's going to be living in a house with 5 kids and is moving right back to being married. I get to date! I get to find myself again and have fun. He's gotten himself more stuck now than he was before! Hee hee hee. J~
M 35 H 29 M 4 yrs T 9 yrs D 3 S born 10/19/07 Bomb 09/10/07 Separated next day OW - broke up and H moved out 09/07/08 Status - still figuring this out
