Well, I still think she's walking all over you and you need to do something different. I think you should go with the 180 and take care of you.
Especially after reading your thoughts on her reaction. No we should not "assume" (But you know what results your efforts have given you in the past) we should not have expectations (you don't) and this is not "reverse psychology". It is doing something different because what you're doing hasn't been giving you any results and since she is in a power career and you take care of so much around the home, I feel getting her "mad" wouldn't be such a horrible thing.
You take care of your kids every day. You do everything for them. A little long grass won't hurt them and you deserve more respect than your wife is giving you.
