Anyways, I just posted today, so as to not unjustly be made another excuse for "why you didnt..." or similar. Even your long post on how you "offer no excuses", was filled with excuses for yourself. It's sad that I guess you cant even see that. That's why you dont understand Forrest's earlier post to you. He(?) sees it. I see it. But I guess you cant.
I was not going to even recognize this with a response, but I will one last time......
First, I don't like being accused of saying something that I did not say, which FG does quite often. Although I can understand how that could happen when reading so many posts here on the board. I was trying to clear that up for Forrest, b/c he has stated on more than one post that "I" said something when it was not me that said it. I would even go back to read to make sure. Whenever I would point that out....it would be totally ignored in the reply from FG.
The biggest problem I have with you and FG is that I don't like to be called lazy (especially, when neither of you don't have a clue as to what I do everyday and the pure stress that I endure from my job) and I don't like for my explainations which was more FYI, rgarding my health problems to be classified as "excuses".
I am very sensitive about that b/c the majority of people do not understand and it really works on my emotional state to have to deal with the pain of the disease and the attitudes of people I work with...... but there is no point in going on further with it b/c it will be seen as an excuse. I suppose b/c I was laid up in bed all day today b/c I could not function----is just an excuse for ....what? To get to stay in bed all day? It is not enjoyable, I can tell you that! It hurts badly when people are so cold to give off-handed remarks when they don't know....they just don't know. And yet, they would not think of telling people who had a "visable" disease some of the crap I have been told to my face and more behind my back.
How do you try to explain or enligten, or inform something---without it being said that it is only an excuse? If that is the case, then anyone that comes to this board and tells about their marriage problems and goes into any detail about their home life, work situation, health problems, special children they may have to raise, or anything else.....would be seen as "excuses". I believe that is unacceptable from somebody that won't even have his own thread here on the board. If that is the case, this board won't last long, will it?
When asked about why you did not have your own thread on the board....(and get this), you merely said that you had your reasons.....hummmm, sounds like an "excuse" to me. It must be nice to go around giving all that advice to others and yet won't share your own personal life inside your four walls everyday. What are your strategies to get your M back on track? And, remember, no excuses! Would you like for me to give you a list of assignments on what I think you should do? As I recall, when you were sort of backed up into a corner by another person, you had an excuse yourself and said that it wouldn't work in your case. Isn't that the very same thing that I tried to tell you when you continued to press me? And you talk about me not seeing it in my stitch! But then I suppose you are an exception.
Oh, I know you tell about a "family day" once in a while and that you even still have sex with your wife--whenever she will let you, but it isn't the same as shredding your soul on here to try to give people a look inside of where you are livinglife everyday and what you have to deal with on a daily basis. Do you know how that makes me feel for you to come back at me and tell me that it only an excuse?
I think that you were ticked b/c I did not follow your plan for me. So anything I say is an excuse. Okay....that is your opinion. I am entitled to one also, and I don't agree with you. I didn't like what you suggested, but I did allow room for some other suggestion....but you wouldn't move from that narrow mind of "it is my way on this particular issue or no way at all and if you don't do it my way, you are full of excuses". That is the way it came across to me. Perhaps that attitude in you is what your W sees also.
I believe FG's heart is in the right place, but I just cannot understand what he is saying or meaning. It is like something coming from planet Mars at me. He says things that I truly believe he has confused me with somebody else....but then, that is probably just one of my excuses.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
