Sounds like you're starting to make some good observations about yourself - just remember that no matter what happens you'll come out of this as a better person. And a lighter one from the sounds of it!
Hard part is knowing that you can fix yourself but she may not work on herself. It takes two. This is where I'm at - I've been DBing my butt off and she is in complete avoidance mode.
Gee, someone else has those cold sweats? And here I thought it was just me ...
