well the wife cslled me today. told me how nice it was i had brought her socks and camera. she then told me that the fact i had told her that i was on the fence right now was a slap in the face. she said she had tried everything for a year and i didnt get better so fo me to give up after a few months was crap. she then asked if i wasted to see other people to see if we would miss eachother.
I told her that if she wanted to see someone else and that would be her disision, to make on her own. the fact that she brought if up seemed to point she wanted to andthat was ok, but i didnt. so if she saw someone else it would be on her terms not ones i provided or justified by saying i would as well.
we then asked about what she thought was the problems in the marrage. she said she felt neglected and disrespected. i told her that i was trying to show that now, and thats what me being on the fence ment. i was working to save our marrage but i was doing it in a way that so far didnt make her any more comfortable. i told her i am take ing this time to think and reavaluate my position and how i can be fair to her and to myselh.
she ened the conversation saying all we can to is try. what a whisy washy responce. so i told her fine lets try to see a movie next week wensday. she said she could maeby make that. again with the whisy washy crap.
i hope i made the right desision about telling her to see other people was her dicision. that is one thing she needs to validat for herself. she seemed top want me to make that a easy out for her by saying " yes we should go out and see othere poeple. I know you guys haver told me to validiat and affirm but thats the one rock i do stand on. cheating is cheating and to do it under the disguise of just testing the waters is cowardly at best. i feel she is doing it anyway and dosent want to feel guily about it. thoughts?
