Sorry you're finding yourself here. It's a tough situation to be in, but you'll get some great support and advice here. Have you also posted in Newcomers? I'd recommend that as well as this forum as you'll get lots of different perspectives.
If you've read DB, you know about goal-setting and 180s. Are you also implementing the LRT? Your focus should, as you rightly say, be on yourself. When you interact with W, be friendly, upbeat and happy. She will need space and time to start taking steps back, but it can be done (read the success stories in newcomers for hope). I know it's hard, but try not to focus on OM. If your W is MLC, OM is a panacea for her pain
And keep posting.
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart. And you'll never walk alone.
