I agree. I am going to treat this very, very carefully if she comes back. I will maintain all of my 180s but I don't think I will be satisfied that the marriage is viable until there is evidence to suggest that.
I will always work much harder on the M that I used to; I think that's a natural consequence of DBing and it would take a good two years before I really start to think of us as "reconciled".
I have no expectations at the moment. None whatsoever. As far as I am concerned I still need to make plans for my future without her in it.
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)