Thanks for sharing your situation with us on here. It seems remarkably similar to mine except I was the one agressively pushing for divorce when I found out about my wife's OM. I think this 180 led to my wife stalling and woke her up to what she stood to lose.
Keep doing what works and rejecting what does not and be sure to look after GavinO's own life and enjoyment. It's very, very tough I know but we simply have to hang in there. The consequences of not trying are far worse than the consequences of trying - irrespective of the outcome. I know what it's like to want the chaos just to end.
best,
GH31
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
