I have mixed feelings about contacting the W. It sounds like she already knows about the affair from what you say, so what is your motivation for doing so? I don't know that info about the OM will help you in your sitch always? I do know that the OW in my case is quite different than me: I'm a sahm and 100% committed to my kids (probably had too much focus on my kids and not enough on my H in the past), and she is a workaholic lawyer and doesn't spend too much time with her kids. I bet in many cases, the OP are very different, the grass is always greener, etc. The knowledge doesn't really change me at all; if H wants a workaholic not interested in their kids, that is something I am not interested in turning myself into; I do wonder if he will eventually get tired of that. If that's what he wants then I am not the woman for him obviously.

I pray every night as well. I feel that standard DBing fits in well with letting God do the major work, but I feel comfortable that GAL and the other DB typical techniques are compatible with my daily prayer. \:\) Have you tried praying about your question about contacting OW as well and seeing if you are provided an answer? It usually does help me to pray about things that I am worried/thinking about like that. Karen

Me 53
D18, S24