Tonight we talked on the phone for 16 minutes. What a nice call. Both of us were really happy and upbeat, just two people catching up on each other's days.
My DB coach Joann said to not initiate contact all the time; however whenever I do have her on the phone, try throwing out a few things and monitor how it goes. She says it's like fishing, throw something out and see if you get a nibble...or a bite.
If not, don't throw it out again. Try something different.
So that's what I did.
Backstory: I have a breakfast meeting tomorrow morning with a VP of a company I am interested in possibly working for. W asked if I would jump at the opportunity if something looked promising in our meeting. I said, possibly, but I am also exploring 3 opportunities in Phoenix which look intriguing.
She said "Oh MM, I know I've always talked about Arizona, but I really don't think I could live where it's 120 degrees".
BAM!! Did she just say what I think she said??
That was an "US" statement if I ever heard one!
I know we shouldn't over-analyze everything our W's say...but that was a biggie.
Now I am going to bed, and I feel very good about our phone call!
Well I had my meeting with the VP...went very well, looks like a career change will be happening a few months from now!
W's office is directly across the street from where I had the meeting (as fate would have it). So I called and said "come down the elevator, I'd rather talk to you about this than discuss on the phone".
She was really happy, we had a nice talk, she said "wow, you have to wait for December for this to play out?"
I saw my opportunity....
"Well if nothing else, you know that I can be patient, and I'm good at waiting!" I said, and we both had a good laugh.
Just before I said goodbye, she opened her arms and gave me a huge hug. So nice.
When I got back to the office, this email was waiting:
so happy for you!! hopes and dreams - that's what it's all about isn't it?
I responded:
Yes it is. It’s nice to have hopes and dreams and see that potential can be realized if you just put yourself out there.
I am extremely happy with the way I presented myself today, would not change a thing.
Thanks for your support W.
Good feelings all around! MM
Right then, i received a phone call from the leader of a rock band I wanted to audition for. They want me to come in and play with them a week Friday! So I emailed W:
Auditioning for lead guitar/harmony vocals in a rock and roll cover band next Friday night.
The leader just called me and we went over song lists, skill levels, expectations etc.
It’s a professional paid gig situation.
Didn’t know “putting myself out there” was going to be so much fun! :-)
She came right back:
I thought this was supposed to be about me? :-P
Talk about getting trumped!! Too cool!
She sees I am getting on with doing stuff for ME. I'm sure she is scratching her head and wondering what's gotten into me!
This is a good day. My GAL is unfolding and giving me something to do as well as being a creative outlet for my artsy fartsy side
Me: 42/H: 37 T: 10 years/M: 8 D9, S8 Bomb: 7.23.07 Separated: 1.20.08 D Final 3.19.09 Affair started in '05, found out parts in 11/07. They married 11.26.09
She just called to ask me a couple of questions about her laptop, and a program that she wanted installed on it.
W: "I guess I'll just bring my laptop to Easter dinner at Mom's, and you can install it then?"
Me: "Sure, sounds good" I said. "So you wanna do anything between now and then?"
W: "Well it just sounds like you are so busy".
Me: "I'm going out with friends tonight and I have another thing tomorrow...but Friday is a holiday, maybe we can grab dinner or something".
W: "Yeah, that sounds nice"
Me: "OK, I'll be in touch"
Like my DB coach says...throw little things out there and see how she responds. If badly, don't do it again. This was a good response. But it is 2 days from now....a LOT can happen in 48 hours!!
You're doing some amazing things and amazing things are happening for you!!
I'm so happy for you and also very proud of you!
The music thing - now that you're not on a boat every weekend......hmmmm, kinda making this shift a little easier isn't it? One passion for another. Curious though, the one you are now going to explore is a childhood dream come true! Authentic or what? Maybe we should sell our shares at CB. What do you think? That could help pay for the remainder of my schooling.
Do you want some company tonite?
I responded "sounds good - call me later re where/when to pick you up"
This was a major reaching-out gesture from her. She rarely initiates us getting together. We'll see how it goes. I just wish she would start to talk about reconciling more.
I have decided that next time we have an R talk, I am going to propose that we "ease" into moving back together, because in reality I am a bit scared too. By that I mean, stay together for 3 nights, stay apart for 3-4 days...just to get a feel for each other again. And to show her it doesn't have to be an all-or-nothing proposition.
thats a good idead MM. after this time apart you realy do need this time to see were you both mesh. moving in now is just as big a step as when you guys first moved in. in a way your both strangers and are relarning the dail paterns of eachother.
