I think W wants us both... HELP!

[Sugar and Spice]

I think what puppy was saying was not telling her what she needs to do, but what YOU are refusing to do anymore, ie: having any sort of R with her while she has OM. This puts it on you, not her. You aren't forcing her hand and demanding she make a decision, you are simply saying that you are no longer willing to continue to have her cake and eat it too.

Its not easy, but I finally did it to and it was the best thing that I have done for ME so far.

As long as she is getting her needs met, she will be more than happy to continue this way of life. She has her best-friend in you and her OM for her physical needs, so she really doesn't have to over-think trying to make any decisions or changes in her life. She in a sense, has it all.

I'm certainly the last person to tell anyone else what to do as you know your sitch better than anyone, but getting that distance will help you to less highs and lows.