I will try this again with a clearer head..help

[Dom R]

A few more thoughts, from early morning brain power

so wouldn't that mean that being in a marriage with an ungodly spouse who doesnt want in it be NOT in God's best interest for our lives on this earth?

Paul writes, that it is best not to marry an "ungodly spouse" in the first place. However, once you are married... you are married!. God prefers us not to make poor choices, but if we do.. he then expects us to be mature adults, and live up to the consequences and responsabilities resulting from them.

King David had one of the worst possible starts to a marriage. He committed adultery with Bathsheba. then MURDERED her husband.
Then he marries her?!?!

It is difficult to imagine a more unGodly union. And as far as the wife goes; whether or not she wanted her husband killed, she was clearly a willing party to the adultery.

Did God tell David, "You must divorce this unGodly woman,and end this unholy marriage" ? Did he say "you made a poor choice", or "it doesnt count"?
No. Because David was married, and that is that. They were "joined together as one", before and with God., and even God will not choose to undo that, once it is done.
"God hates divorce".

Bad choices and reasons for getting into it aside, a marriage is a marriage. David made the commitment; God expected him to then stick to it.
Even beyond just "sticking to it"; God honored that marriage, by making David and Bathsheba's child (second child, born WITHIN the marriage) Solomon, king of Israel, amoung many other things.