You don’t have the daily problems that others are facing. That’s true. You have your problems, and they are not insignificant.
Don’t know if I ever pointed you there before, but I’m gonna give you a link to a very old thread of mine. It’s one of my pet peeves that people think that someone else’s problems are bigger than their own, ipso-facto, their problems aren’t worth other people’s attention.
Quoting hoping: I still hope each time that he might bring something up about US..but he does not, and as I said before I am afraid to ask for fear I won't like the answer.. I hope I will know when the time has come for the r talk..in order for both of us to move on...Sometimes I think it is so comfy that we don't need to talk..other times I realize that this can't be rushed...it might be another 6 mos, it might be a year...
There’s a good foundation for your fear. Once something is verbalized, it is very hard to take back. Your caution is a very good thing. At the same time, caution requires patience, and having to be patient for so many things, and for so long is frustrating.
It is a testament to your strength that you can remain patient through so much frustration.
And you will know when it’s time for an OR talk. When you can perceive a certain amount of receptiveness in your H, it’ll be time. And when it finally does happen, you may still not get the reaction you’d hoped for. Edging into OR talks often brings a knee-jerk reaction from the SO. Sober second thought sets in later, so when it happens, and if you get a negative reaction, don’t fret.
In the mean time, comfy isn’t so bad. Not great, but until you and your H are ready to go out of your comfort zone, try to relax and be comfy.
