Well, there really isn't any party, but it is my birthday, and it is St. Patty's Day...and I just want to hit my H over the head with a shillelagh!! Or maybe one of our hurleys...
Just feeling very frustrated with my sitch today. Looking at my last year beginning with a '4'; that while H, with the boys, is going through the motions of putting together a pleasant day for me (had cards this a.m. and my favorite dinner and some gifts tonight), is getting messages from OW about how much she missed him this weekend, replete with "ILY", etc, and that he's been calling her over the w'end as well.
I know that i have to turn away from knowing about their sitch... my choice to act 'as if' is my choice, I am no victim. This is still up to me...and right now, I still don't want to be the one to expose their A, and possibly bring about an outcome that i'm not ready to embrace.
I will have some help in this starting tomorrow...picking up new cell phones for our 'family plan' (how ironic...) so that H will be able to conduct convos with OW more directly (up till now, ow has called h's work phone to leave messages for him...) and I will not be tempted/able to know how to access them.
But man, it s*cks...and I don't really like my party right now.
