I'm sorry, KAW. I really don't know what to say. I know this is no consolation, but you've have done so much to try and keep your M alive. Let's face it, your W is in a lot of pain, with her depression and such, and has a lot of soul-searching to still do and issues to work out. OM will inherit these issues, as you've had to deal with them for some time now.
Perhaps she never finished this process before because it was cut so short (if I remember correctly if only last a couple of weeks or so)? Perhaps she needs to see what an R (if you could call it that) with OM is really like to realize what she really has with you? I have a feeling she is going to crash hard...but that's the path she is making for herself...
It's awful, but now it's time to protect yourself, KAW. I'm so very sorry...
