That's great that you found "The Divorce Remedy" - Read it all the way through, and search through the extensive resources in this online community. There is so much here that has helped me immensely.
Maybe someone on these boards, from the Atlanta area could make a recommendation on an individual counselor, but getting a personal recommendation from someone you know in your area (or a friend of a friend) is a good way to find one. I don't think the DB site can make recommendations due to possible liability issues.
From what I've read over the past year here on DB, many persons have had much more success by attending a Retrouvaille weekend, than compared with marriage counseling or individual counseling for months and months. You can learn more here: http://www.helpourmarriage.com/ It looks like Atlanta has some upcoming weekends in May and July.
Your fear of having a counselor tell your husband to "follow his bliss" is well founded. In my situation, my wife's accupuncturist recommended an IC to her in Nov 2006. I thought it was a good idea for her to see a counselor, because I knew she had struggled with self-esteem issues for most of her life. However, I did not know she had been developing a two-month old emotional affair via the internet at the time. It turns out that in their very first session, my wife told the IC about the other man and how they were thinking of meeting in NYC, and her counselor thought "it would be a good idea for them to meet, because it would bring them to a place of reality instead of fantasy" - WTF! I found this out months later when I got access to her e-mails for a few weeks and read through their e-courtship. But I knew snooping was not good for my mental health, so I gave that up nine months ago. Unfortunately, I believe their affair has continued.
One of the hardest things to for me to come to terms with, is that I cannot control what my wife chooses to do, and I cannot control who she seeks advice from. She has consistently sought and received advice and support from friends and relatives who have been divorced, or some friends who have had affairs. She has elected to not seek counseling with our church's pastors, or to get insight from friends who worked through marital difficulties.
If your husband is willing to go to an individual counselor, maybe he would be willing to attend a Retrouvaille weekend, and maybe you might find a Solution-oriented Brief Therapy counselor you could both see together.
Best wishes to you,
LG
Me 46 WAW 45 M 21 yrs
WAW: "I need to be alone" 12/06 W moves out 3/07 Mediation finalized 08/08
