The Last Cut Is The Deepest

[hopefloats7]

I think I have mourned the loss of my marriage, and I got through that part. What it is now is losing the chance to have a new R with him. I guess I just always hoped...

Maybe this is a form of running in a way, but many others have and would see it has a healthy response to the point he's at now. A New Me was right; he does have some sound points. I find it healthy that he doesn't wish to punish himself forever and he wants to move beyond the past. We all want that. But at the crossroad he faced, he chose to take the path without my name on it, and off he goes.

It will hurt, thinking of him with someone new, someone who doesn't remind him of his failings, someone he can be this new, good man to. I have to say, from speaking with him it certainly sounds like he's going to try his hardest. I can tell he is curious about a future with her from how he talked about it.

I think he wants me to be ok with this; to think of his happiness instead of my own (which would include us working this out). He implies that decision wouldn't be for his happiness.

The way I feel about it now, I had the youth of him, the young adult, then the worst years of his life. Now he's ready to give the new & improved to a new woman. I should be so lucky.