My therapist pointed out that without an ability to admit the affair was wrong coupled with an apology there is no real ability to repair or heal the marriage.
My pastor says that without an acknowledgment that the affair was wrong it's tantamount to threatening adultery for the remainder of the marriage.
Unless, perhaps, the WAS can re-commit to the marriage and future fidelity even though they believe affairs are OK sometimes. Sort of a charitable abstention. In other words they can make a promise and keep it, even though they don't think infidelity is wrong in an absolute sense.
Dunno.
In my personal experience, I find the "high-handed" unremorseful, unapologetic justification of an affair very hard to get past, even if the WAS were to recommit to the marriage.
