Had a hard morning. Woke up to my alarm (which is music), and it was a song H and I used in our wedding. The girls were fighting, and I was going on about 3 hours of sleep. I am having more and more trouble falling asleep as time goes on. I cried hard after I got the girls off to school. Then I called a friend (thank you so much SallyM!) and she helped me feel better.
H was at the house today when a package arrived. It was just a billion Florida photos I had printed off snapfish. But it was addressed to my first initial and then maiden name. H freaked, asking me if I *already* changed my name, why did I do that, etc. I calmly told him its because I ordered it off an email acct with my maiden name in my email address, and that is how they address the package. He had a small freak out.
My babies are off school next week, looking forward to the time with them, at least now...ask me again next week.
I'm sorry you had a hard morning. I just heard our wedding song the other day too. Funny....it's Real Love by Bob Seger. I loved that song.
I'm so glad your "friend" was able to help you feel better. I'm with ya on the not sleeping so well deal. I've wanted to be in to work early the last two days and have gotten myself up just in time to squeak in at 8:00 am.
Wow, your H freaked about the name deal. You handled it, but there's always the part of me that would have asked him what it matters.
Lucky you for having the kids off next week. D3 keeps asking if she can have 5 stay-at-home days.
SueS
ME: 42, H: 42, D6 Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs. Attended Retrouvaille - December 2009 Status: Working on it day by day
LWB, I've used Tylenol or Advil PM as a sleep aid before. It was recommended to me by a friend. You can also get Simply Sleep, made by Tylenol, which contains the ingredient that helps you sleep (Diphenhydramine). I usually only take 1/2 a dose. It may leave you a little groggy in the morning, but it's better than trying to operate on minimal sleep time.
I just don't get your H ... freaking out about you possibly changing your name. I agree with Sue. You handled it well.
I would suggest you look into Melatonin as an over the counter supplement. It is a natural hormone our bodies need to adjust to the correct circadian rhythms, and it promotes restful sleep. It works like a charm for me, without making me feel like I am so heavily drugged up in the morning. It makes you feel naturally sleepy.
Remember my friend, "M"? She had tried everything short of tranquilizers to get a good night's sleep. I suggested Melatonin to her in one of our meetings, as a passing suggestion. Later that week her own doctor suggested it, and she then recalled I had mentioned it as well. She tried it and it really helped.
I'll second the melatonin. My d8 uses it to help her sleep (she has autism spectrum and some of these children have low melatonin). She has been able to go to sleep within about 30 minutes of the melatonin, and then has slept better throughout the night as well as she used to stay up late and wake up frequently through the night!
I've been having problems sleeping lately too and thanks to NoCode's suggestion, I think I will try using them as well (hadn't thought of that)!!! Karen
Its been a rough couple of days. H is definately going dark on me (only texting/calling if its kid related). In turn I have done the same. I miss my friend, but still relish the space I have received.
Today I went to the funeral for a friend of mine. While driving from the funeral to work, in the pouring rain, lost (major highway closed in StL), missing my friend....H calls....I pick up because I knew it was the girls. I kept it together talking to them but lost it when H got on. I think I shocked him because I have held it together for three weeks. He quietly helped me get to work, and texted later about stuff about the house/kids. His way of checking on me. Yes, H, your crazy W is ok.
I am learning to not set myself up. I honestly thought H would check on me throughout these first weeks. Not once. Not even a condolence when he discovered my friend died. I am learning to not expect even a minimum. My fault, won't happen again.
Props to H on many things though: not complaining once about his drive to and from to see the girls, keeping the house totally clean (even my laundry) while he is there, keeping the house up and running (repairs), putting the girls first (letting me pick up D3 from school on "his" day because she asked for me). He is doing his best. I am doing my best. We just aren't doing it together. He is lost, he is angry at me for my failings in the M, he is angry at himself for what he has done. He is a mess. I do NOT regret finally getting him out of the house. I am not afraid of the future, except for praying my kids adjust to whatever change is coming.
Sorry to hear about your friend, LWB. It's so unexpected when someone young dies and it really makes you think about your own life. And sorry you had a bad moment when H called, but it sounds like he handled it very well, so that is comforting. You will be fine, and the girls will be fine. And someday, H will be fine too.
AS you know from that waful post I made to Mark once, losing a friend your own age is such a shock. On top of all you have been through it seems like the last straw.
lwb - I am sure you needed a release of some kind - you are such a rock nearly all the time. ((((((HUGS))))))) to you - you are one wonderful lady.
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
