My H hates life and people and responsibilities. I am pretty sure he is still infatuated with that stripper and he definitely still goes to see her. He has become a huge alcoholic. He admittedly says he is depressed and cant sleep, and spends money like its going out of style. There is just no resemblences of my old H left for me to cling on to anymore. It sucks!
scary, you could be describing my H! (ow isnt' a striper but a paid escort/ho, and his debts have caught up with him and he owes thousands now and is panicking). Sooner or later your H's responsibilities will catch up with him, it's only a matter of time.
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Everytime I get my mind off him for a bit, the memories (good and bad) come rushing in and flood me with emotions that I simply don't know how to deal with anymore.
This is what I do, I've divided my life with my H in 2: the one before he left the first time, when he was a good man/H, a responsible father, and the "after" H, the broken, selfish, alien of a man he's become. So, I'm able to recall the good times without much hurt, just some yearning, but still keep them because I had a chance to love and be loved and we had great times that will be buried treasures in the back of my mind. That good man has nothing to do with the awful own who threatened me with a L for the past week or the one who put ow first and disregard my feelings, that men I DO NOT NEED, I would not want a man who cares nothing for my feelings, whom I gave chance after chance and who betray me time after time.
I want you to read this old thread of mine, when I had to learn to let go of H because of him being toxic and dragging me down again and again... (the bottom half of the pg)
