Oh, This Is Bad...Like My Worst Nightmare

[Kimmie Lee]

Wow.

Worse and worse. My H and his D18 are going to move in with his OW and her two kids.

Sigh.....is it too much to hope that this new relationship will go down in flames? H is moving this along quickly.

[Kimmie Lee]

Please, somebody tell me that H and OW won't last.......

I'm dying here.

[JoieDeVivre]

Kimmie!
No one can say what will happen with your H and OW. However, statistically, affair relationships don't last because WAS don't realize it's not the people they are with that make a good relationship. If they had problems in the relationship they're leaving, they're gonna have problems in the new one, too.

It takes two in any relationship and he certainly didn't try very hard. You were not to blame for all of the problems. I'm sure this next relationship is not going to be smooth sailing either. He's going to find it very challenging to suddenly have 2 more kids to deal with.

I know your heart is breaking over this but remember to DB -- for your own emotional and mental health. You can't make him come back to you. But the more you DB, the better you will feel. And when you do get to see him, you're going to look (and feel) great!

((((HUGS))))

Joie

[Kimmie Lee]

Thank you so much. I needed that.

I know that the sooner he moves into his Brady Bunch sitch, the sooner he may become stressed. I pray that is so.

As it is, he's pushing so hard for this D, wants it done like yesterday. Also, he doesn't want to pay any spousal maintenance anymore. Probably wants to keep all his money for his shiny new family.

[karen43]

Please, somebody tell me that H and OW won't last.......

I'm dying here.

OK, H and OW won't last. I don't believe so anyway, esp. not with the addition of kids too. I believe DR and DB quote something very low like 90% or something of these relationships fail, so chances are that they will and I would think the addition of kids would make the chances even lower as that adds more stress of course.

I know for a fact my H has been pretending to be a "neat" person with OW so I think that will be hard for him to keep up, and he has anger issues, etc. I think when you live with someone it is harder to keep up the facade that you have when you have just been dating a few hours here and there, which I think everyone does to some extent. Karen

[Kimmie Lee]

Thank you Karen, I needed that.

[JoieDeVivre]

Kimmie,
How are you?

I read something interesting about people who marry their A partners: that TRUST is usually a big issue in the relationship. I can imagine so!

I found this article interesting, too (it pretty much says what everyone else has said here):
http://www.ojar.com/view_5441.htm

Joie

[Kimmie Lee]

Thanks for the article Joie.

But I think H really believes he's happy with his new Brady Bunch. I don't see it ending any time soon and we will be long divorced by then.

I keep trying to think of the positives:

I don't have the stress of living with his dark moods, I don't have to put up with the disrespect from step-D, I do have my own future and a new career to look forward to.

It just feels icky that I can't talk with or share anything with H anymore. He was my best friend.

[LL44]

I don't have the stress of living with his dark moods, I don't have to put up with the disrespect from step-D, I do have my own future and a new career to look forward to.

It just feels icky that I can't talk with or share anything with H anymore. He was my best friend.

Minus the step D, I could have written this. Its so odd to be 'out' of H's life, very hard to get used to. Take care and HUGS!

[SweetRedd]

go?