Ok, now I really am going to bed. H called back and we talked for about 10-15 minutes. He said my texts were pretty self-explanatory and totally justified. He said he obviously will need to find ways to show me that I can trust him again in order for me to be willing to give it another try...I simply responded that actions speak louder than words, that I know I am 2 hours away so that part may seem difficult, but he is an intelligent man and will find a way to prove himself if he so desires...
I have read his repeated texs to OW--thinking of you, love you, looking beautiful today, call me, smile, look at me, etc... (granted look at me only works if you are in the same office). I have experienced the volume of lies and manipulation he will go through in order to be with her, and to try to keep me in the dark. Since I know the lengths he has gone to for HER, I have high expectations/standards for what he must to for ME if I decide to give him another chance down the road...In other words a Hallmark card and a dozen roses ain't gonna cut it this time...
Oh well as a positive we were able to talk about S and D and our day together and kept it upbeat...I want to always be accessible as "mom of his kids/coparent", and up to a point his friend. I just can't be more than that unless/until major changes take place.
I am way ahead of myself but I am glad that H is up there and I am here now. That means we are "separated in a way already so I don't have to deal with explaining that to the kids yet. Also I don't have to see him every day, which hurts my resistance....
Funny in Jan when he planned to move out I never thought I would say I am glad I don't see him every day.......
