Dom, She wanted to talk about a seperation about six months ago. At that time my mind set was that If we were going to work on our mariage we needed to be in the same house. About four months later I realized something had to change. I read Sex starved marriage and Divorce remedy and tried to start making changes in my life. I have almost always came home from work, cook, feed my daughter, give her a bath, put her to bed, clean the dishes, pick up toys, and W sits on the couch watching tv. Before I read the books I did these things with haste because W's laziness. Then I realized she wasn't doing anything because she wasn't happy. So I started being upbeat and happy all the time. Two months later things still seemed to be going down hill so I asked W if she still wanted to S. She said she didn't think we needed to seperate she wanted a divorce but she would think about it for a couple days but wasn't promising anything. The next day she called and asked if I would go to a MC. We went to 3 assesment sessions and I am now waiting to hear if she wants to try counseling or if she just wants to get a divorce. I only know a couple of things about why she feels this way. All she would tell me was that she wasn't happy, couldn't give any reasons other than we were arguing about every other day. Arguments are always about the same things... events that have occured in the past. No affairs or anything like that. Just typical stuff (money, in-laws, and etc...) but it seems she holds it all in and holds a grudge instead of trying to learn and work toward the future. Before we seperated, I tried to talk to her several times (using the methods in the books) to find out what was wrong and why she felt the ILYBNILWY. Her anwser was always the same, "I don't know, I think I just need some time to figure things out." I don't think going dark will solve all of my problems but I don't know what else I can try. I feel like I have tried everything else to no avail. Plus, my biggest fault (I think) was I was pushy (for anwsers), clingy, always wanting to know where she was, and etc.. The books helped alot with this. Once all intimate things stoped i wanted them more and I became desperate. I hope I have you given you enough to go on. There is plenty more which Im sure will come out later.
