No, it's not meant to be patronizing. I really don't think there's any clear cut answer to your question and I'm tying to find similar analogies to test it out.
What "should" be is a hypothetical question. The only way I know to get as close as possible to an accurate answer to any question like this is to test it (or live it), and I personally think the amount of variables makes it extremely difficult, if not impossible, to predict the outcome. Also, one generally doesn't want to live their life as a science experiment... so the best I think one can probably do is to consider as many variables as possible and then make a decision based on intuition....keeping in mind that intuition can be faulty....
There is never anything wrong with questioning things like this. I sometimes wonder about the same thing myself. There have been plenty of moments I've wanted (or dreamed!) of being a WAS. I think it's very wise of you to think carefully about this before making any personal decisions.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
