SG my $10 probably worth 2Cents. Realize this is probably the most difficult period of your life. Often multiple major disasters befall you at once. (Health, financial, Military deployment, and so on). Reguardless of your involvement this is a test by fire which you will get through. Like an old warrior you will be stonger, chewed up, and wiser. However you must go through this.
Divorce is like a death however the dead is still alive and the pain is magnified. Recovery comes in stages. Learn them. You will not skip most of them since if you do the missing stage may come back with a vengence. Thus do not jump into another complex relationship immediately to avoid the pain of seperation. You just doubled your failure rate.
This is a time to work on you and rebuild from the ashes. * Find what really motivates you. That is a gift. Often there are numerous things that motivate thus if #1 is totally unobtainable go to your backup. From that * Create a vision of what you want to be in 1, 2, and 5 years. It will change do not worry. From that * create goals. These are major steps to achieve the vision doing the things that motivate you. They can be quantified though usually loosely. Avoid things like ( I will feel better by May 5th) If you fall short evaluate the causes. Maybe you cannot do 20 chinups when 20 lbs overweight. Shorten that step. From that. * Plan and excute actions. They lead to positive habits and the actions become easier. * Rest. (I'm terrible at this) God took a day off. You tougher than God? * Vent. Find a listener who does not go to FIXIT mode. * At the end of each day evaluate. What was good, What was bad, how could you acted or reacted to improve things. Not all evaluations are correct as time goes on you will get better. * DO not beat yourself up. Be honest and realize that you will make mistakes and the same ones over and over. People who swear they never make the same mistake twice are dishonest or are fools and do not realize their mistakes. Avoid them. * If you really fall off the table ok I waxed the table last week. You will fail and learn. No worries. * When you are 100 convinced you are correct and know all the facts there are more facts. We are all just chickens crossing the Dan Ryan (I57 in Chicago) of life. Unless you are these chickens. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybVb3t560oY
Suggested reading outside DB Purpose filled life to find out what motivates you Rapid relief from Emotional Distress (helps your redirect) The world's greatest Salesman (believe it or not you are always selling yourself) Cat in the Hat. (Cause all this self help makes my brain hurt and all these books pump themselves up in the first few chapters)
"All I want is a weeks pay for a day's work" Steve Martin
