Sadly, I SHOULD have been a movie star. But I'm not.....
My life is not perfect. Yeah, it could be better.... I could give everything up and try to acieve that goal. Or, I can just try to enjoy my life the way it is, continue to do things that make me happy in spite of not having what I really should have. And I know for certain I SHOULD have been a movie star. There have been so many choices in my life. And the roads I've taken, maybe they've been mistakes. How can I know which one is best. There are things I have or could have had.... and how much of this should I dwell on? What can I change or what should I change now? Will it make my life any better or worse? Can I ever know where a road taken will lead and if it's going to bring me happiness?
runningoutoftime,
It could be that you realy believe you should have been a movie star and made some decisions along the way that had you stray from that course...but it seems like your post is patronizing. The thought that one should have had some career or should be in some certain position in life is very different than questioning whether or not a relationship should be.
My question/pondering is not so much the shoulda/coulda/woulda but a serious inquiry into whether or not the marriage we've chosen to stay in realy is a m worth staying in. By questioning whether or not we SHOULD have gotten back together or SHOULD stay together now I'm simply assessing the situation. Would it be better if I just decided I'm not happy and went off to have an a and abondon my family?
Remember when you post to me that I'm NOT the WAS. I'm here trying to avoid becoming a WAS. If I believed I should have been a movie star, comedian, talk show host, singer, athelete, balerina, hip hop dancer, skateborder, olympic swimmer, runner, accountant, bank teller, newspaper delivery person, retail store owner, trash pick up person, police officer, teacher, day care owner, small business owner, writer, painter...and was blaming the issues in my m on that I think there would be posting on another site gearred more toward obtaining the career of your dreams or changing your career later in life etc. The choices that I've made that did not allow me to become whatever it is I may have been supposed to be are not h's fault and I don't place any blame on him for where I am in areas that are not directly effected by my m. I've made the choices. I'm not holding him responsible for my happiness but if I'm not happy in the r with him, my needs are not being met then I don't see what's wrong with questioning if the r should be or not. It's simply wording. What if instead of posing the question as "if the r SHOULD be" I questioned whether or not the r was/is HEALTHY for each parnter"? Same question in my mind but maybe posing it that way will stop people from thinking I'm a dreaming was on some alien ship. I'm living in reality have been for the past 6 years. If I'm an alien then the aliens make a whole lot more sense than the stay married because you got married group.
