Beginning again like a newbie

[ACJ]

Or will you be in this sitch regardless of when you D?

Yes this will be the case regardless of when we D. Currently the market is low so it would actually be a good time to D (if there ever is one). Even if (God forbid) my parents were to die and I became eligible for any inheritance they have left me it wouldn't change my financial situation b/c they have had it written into thier will that until my D is final I will not receive a penny. They have done this to protect thier money and me and I totally understand why.

Did you tell him this is why you want to wait?

No I didn't. He knows the same as I do that financial things are unlikely to change in the near future. He wanted to be D six weeks after we had been S two years (in England this is the earliest you can get M again after a D). He never said it was b/c he wants to M OW but they are engaged so it would be a fair assumption to look at it this way.

My H willfully misunderstood

My H refuses to engage in any conversation other than that which HE chooses to enter into. He is simply not interested in what I have to say. It's his way.... end of! He will not allow me to state how I feel either about him or our finances. He cannot bear to be in the same room as me for longer than he has to.


I have a question for you all:

When H was here on Friday he gave me the monthly cheque which should make the maintenance he pays me the amount specified by my L. (He refuses to put the standing order up). It was for a very small amount in the grand scheme of things (less than £100). It was less than last month b/c he said his L had told him it was ok to take the amount he pays for S15s gym membership off it. I didn't complain about this but asked him to cancel the membership as he never takes S15 to the gym and he is too young to go by himself. That sets the scene.

Here is my question:
As I stated this cheque was for a relatively small amount. I can manage w/o it. From what the children have said H needs this money at the moment more than I do. I have considered giving it back to him and telling him what I have just outlined above. Is this the right thing to do?