Hello again! As usual, the bar is open, and hugs are available! There are also a variety of appetizers, and perhaps even full meals available.
So, what is going on? Not much. S19 is back in North Carolina, soon to be in Africa. S18 is still a pain in the neck. W is still in the guestroom. I am still a bit discouraged.
I think that we are planning a trip up to the college that we would prefer S18 to attend the 16th to 18th or so. He doesn't want to go, but I don't think he will get a choice. I hoping that seeing it will help him see his parents' superior wisdom!
Then, W says that her brother (of the recently repaired hips) May be visiting around the first of April. Whether he will stay here, or at her parents' house is unknown. But she requested getting "our" room and bathroom into condition that she could sleep in here if he uses the guestroom. So, I guess I'd better get the far edge of the bed cleared off!
What's all that mean? I think that I will continue doing what I am doing, for the present, and put off pressing the issue until after that visit, or until I know it isn't happening. Then, I will ask her what we can do to make this better.
Tonight's interaction: She had a long day. She was a bit fed up with her "preceptor", or teaching nurse, at work. The preceptor didn't like visitors in the room when she was doing anything. W says a lot of the nurses feel that way. W thinks that in many cases the benefit of having family in the room outweighs the inconvenience. I told her that I really agreed with her. I think it was a compliment, at least it felt like one to me.
Jeff, your wife is sharing her day with you, this is good. She may be sleeping with you in April, also good. I think waiting until after the visit for the conversation is a sound idea.
Come on now Jeff, if the clutter makes her crazy, do a 180. It really is cleansing. If you dont absolutely need or love something, throw or give it away. Do a little at a time. Come on, you could do it. I'll help.
Hey Jeff, Here are some tips I found to get you started. I hope you dont mind. Come on, you have until April to get the bedroom done. You could do it! O sorry, I'm getting a little excited here!
TIPS FOR DECLUTTERING
A good place to begin is a one corner of one room. or one drawer or one shelf in your closet. Doing a little daily will help you feel less overwhelmed, discarding what you don't need is extremely helpful.About the sentimental items... take a picture of the item, write down the "story" behind it and formally saying goodbye.
Another option is to find three large boxes and label them friends, acquaintances and strangers. discard the strangers (those items you have no idea what they're for or belong to items you no longer own), organize the "friends" in your newly found space and ask yourself "what would be the worst thing if I discarded ....
1.Declutter for 15 minutes every day. It’s amazing how much you can get through if you just do it in small increments like this.
2.Don’t allow things into the house in the first place. Whether you’ve begun decluttering the living space, or you’ve just completed it, stop bringing in new stuff NOW. Even if that’s ALL you do and don’t start decluttering immediately, if you can only establish one habit at a time, establish the no-more-stuff habit first. This way, when you do get to decluttering the existing stuff, you’ve already stopped making it worse. Think of bailing out a boat with a hole in it. You can bail and bail, but it won’t do anything for the leak.
3.Donate stuff you’re decluttering, so you don’t feel bad about wasting it.
4. Create a Jeff’s Goals chart with decluttering on it — either daily, or 3 times a week. Check off the days when you declutter, and you’ll feel a great sense of accomplishment.
5.Start at the corner by the door and move your way around the room, doing the superficial stuff first - surfaces, empy the bin etc. Repeat, but do more the 2nd time around - ie. open the cupboards.
6.Whenever you’re boiling the kettle for tea, tidy up the kitchen. If the kitchen is tidy, tidy up the next room - it’s only 3 minutes but it keeps you on top of everything (helps if you have an Englishman’s obsession with Tea as well!)
7.Use the “one in, two out” rule. The rule: whenever you bring in an item, you have to throw away two other items. First you cheat, by throwing out two pieces of paper, but soon you will have to move to big stuff.
8.Make your storage space smaller and more minimal. If you have lots of storage, you’ll fill it with stuff.
9.Clothing rule: If you haven’t worn an item in 6 months, sell or donate it.
10.The One-Year Box. Take all your items that you unsure about getting rid of (e.g. “I might need this someday…”), put them in a box, seal it and date it for 1 year in the future. When the date comes, and you still didn’t need to open it to get anything, donate the box WITHOUT OPENING IT. You probably won’t even remember what there was in the box.
11.Declutter one room (including any closets, desks, cabinets, etc.) before starting on the next one. Spending time in that room will feel *so* good, and it will be so easy to keep clean, that it will motivate you to do more!
12.Keep a list in your planner labeled “Don’t Need It - Don’t Want It.” When you’re out shopping and run across some kind of gadget or other item you crave, note it down on the list. This will slow you down long enough to reconsider. Also, seeing the other things on the list that you nearly bought on impulse really helps.
13.Internalize that your value is not in your “stuff”. It is just “stuff.And realize that your value grows when you share your “stuff”. Hoarding is a selfish act.
14. Have someone else (who you trust!) help you go through things. They don’t have the (sometime’s irrational) emotional attachment that you might have, but can still recognize if something should be kept.
15.Gift everything. Books you’ve read immediately get recycled among friends, family or local libraries. If you buy a new gaming system, donate your old one – and all the games.
Oh, boy. Well, I think that will help. Do you really manage to do it? This is going to be really hard! Are you sure I can't rent you for a while? If it got rid of the clutter, I'm sure W wouldn't mind!
Jeff, I would love to help you out! It's one of my favorite things to do. Sad I know. I have a very organized home. My h is even worse than I am. But that would be a big 180 for you. There are a lot of books about it.
Yippeee!!! You are ok in my book, Jeff. ok finish the dryer. Then, Ooohhh, where are we gonna start, huh? Ok, I'll calm down. Take one little pile. Do a quick sort. Then, go through it again to fine tune it. Be ruthless. It's just stuff. You could live without it.
