it is a fact that h works tooo much.... it was always fact to me that work came beofore I did... it was then fed to me that work came before me but that work was for me so it didn't really come before me..
anyway what am I getting at???
I think h works to much to have a "real" r with anyone!!
sure he and ow had a r...in their eyes it was real but it was a few min conversation here and there and a brief visit a few times a week....each having their own family and home to go to at the end of the day.
at least now h complains about working so much..for many reasons...his own stress...being away from home...being away from the kids..and on occassion being away from me..
a day like today feeds into my wanting to just pull away..to retreat...to simply exist in the m as need be to pass the time..to depend on the other "corners" (from charcoals thread) to get me by...
it is very difficult being married to a man who wakes a dawn and is off to work before even the youngest opens her eyes (often h is gone before 6:30 am these days) and doesn't return til 6 or so...then spends time in the yard working..or perhaps sits and eats dinner and tries to tell me a bit about the day while promising son that he will spend some time with him after he eats...to then only have about enough time to shower with son..read him a story and put him to bed...then being so spent by the long day has little to nothing to offer his wife.
now when his wife (that would be yours truly) "complains" about such a life, is met with..."I'm working" "do you think I like it this way" "it's just a busy time" " a few more weeks" "bla bla bla bla"
it is not so much the job as the person...h would be busy even if he only had a 9-5 office job..he would manage to find project after project to keep him busy and distracted...the only change now is that he complains about it or rather expresses displeasure with not being around us as much and makes comments like "I can't wait to get home" "I just want to get home"
in my eyes and probably in h's too...one of the main causes if not the main cause of our problems has been h's working to much!!
but even though h knows this, he still does nothing to change it.
I wonder???????
oh and ya the reason for this little rant...h has a 6:30 apointment...wich may not get him home til 8 (sons bed time) and it is now 5:45 and he still hasn't called yet...I did speak briefly to him around 11am dd wanted to say night night before her nap...that was the last I spoke with him and he was short with me...he is rarely short with the children but can be with me.
I'm sorry but I feel like I should be the one who's hind sind is being kissed not the other way around...why is it I feel like I cannot express at all my displeasure with h's working so much??
