I kind of understand what you're saying and think you make some valid points but I can't help that think that most marriages wither because both spouses get so busy taking care of the house, the kids, finances,(or lack of) their jobs and almost everything and everyone else that they forget to take care of the one person they vowed to "love, honor and cherish." We take each other for granted and think that "our" time will come but the years keep cranking over and "our" time keeps getting pushed aside.
See that's the part that confuses me. I've always been the one noticing and trying to get him to notice/accept/acknowledge maybe even do something about the fact that we don't/haven't/weren't making the time for us. He always seemed to think that falling alseep on the other couch while watching tv in the same room was somehow enough to keep a r going. I knew he worked alot and was absorbed in his business/sports etc. I may have been naive and young when I married him thinking I'd eventually do the same with the kids and the house that would eventually come along and it wouldn't matter so much that he wasn't really accessable. I've discovered that I can balance life. I can take care of the children, the home, the pets, the laundry, myself and still make the time and have the desire for an intimate relationship with a member of the opposite sex (naimly him). He was the one who wasn't/couldn't/wouldn't/isn't/doesn't
So then why was he the one to have an affair and leave?
sure he's back but it's still work/sports/news for him. Still can't/wont/doesn't make time for US so there is slowly becoming no US...sure there's an us in the sense that I'm his wife, we are the parents, it's our house, we do take two family vacations a year (more like we all go somewhere else for a week or two twice a year) but where is the US.
Yes it seems I've jumped back into the...it should have been me who had the affair...attitude.
