Hey Mark, I am new here. Just started posting only 1 month ago. I have read this current thread and must admit that it is hard to hear what some are saying about DBing actually not helping them in their M, as I am still in the early stages and hoping this may work.
I think some spouses are determined to end their marriage no matter what, maybe they are in MLC or addicted to an OP or a combo of the two (as I suspect in my H's case). I think DB'ing helps with your own PMA and that is really important. I was a total mess when I first found my way here, and I have a lot better mental state right now definitely.
I also think I have slowed down my H a little bit in his actions to divorce and selling our house. That ultimately may mean nothing, we may and probably will still divorce, but I think I have at least made him think hopefully a little about his actions by DB'ing rather than the initial chasing, pursing, and begging that I was doing initially. If my H files for divorce, I will also know that I have done everything to save my marriage. Karen
