Still no contact since W moved out. I find it amazing that she could be so conflicted about staying or leaving and now no contact for 5 days. She always has been able to partition her emotional life off and not deal with it. Yesterday was her IC appt. I don't have a lot of hope that much was accomplished, but shouldn't even be thinking about it - it's about her dealing with herself.
Anyway, fighting hard to keep PMA. Spring has sprung and the weather is supposed to be beautiful this weekend. Am planning on a bike ride with new friend, hiking, and starting to plan a native plants garden.
Unfortunately, PMA doesn't include my M, just me. It's really hard for me to see how this could ever work out when she's so intent on fighting it and staying mired in the past. Not even staying mired, but actively dwelling on stuff until she feels trapped in the present by her feelings about the past. Do I need to go a step past detachment and go dark? I'm at that point right now - will need to decide soon because I'll probably get a call from her by the end of the weekend.
